We love each other more and more with every Family Night

It was family night at the Kellogg house. We are making it a goal to go and DO SOMETHING fun as a family at least once a week. So, I have dutifully compiled a list of places and events that are free or super cheap that we can try. Tonight's family activity.....THE MONTE L. BEAN LIFE SCIENCE MUSEUM! Yeah! (For those who don't know that is code for lots of dead stuffed animals). Dallin is obsessed with the movie Night at the Museum and also lions from The Lion King so we thought he would enjoy it,
and he DID (or at least all the lion or lion type animals). "Mommy look it's King!' "Lion is cool!" "Kind says Raaarrr" "I pat it" (no Dallin, you can't pat it, sorry). "I hug it" (No Dallin, no loveys either) "Look look, it's King. Raarrr" He probably would have been content to just sit on the little bench in front of the Liger the whole time, but we drug him around the museum anyways...fortunately there were lion like animals all about which would temporarily stop his screaming at being removed from his perch in front of the Liger exhibit. Plus they have a live animal show every night. Tonight was reptile night. (Oh goody!...but Dallin thinks they are dinosaurs so I tried real hard not to swear and removed myself from the situation as fast as I could when the guy started bringing the snake around) The live animal show was interesting, but way too slow paced for a toddler. Too much talking, not enough petting. Dallin had 1 time out during the show. He sat long enough to pat the snake (almost squeezed the poor thing) and then we took mercy on him (it had already been like 20 minutes of talking and only 1 time petting--Dallin kept yelling "I hold it! I pat it!"). I think it would work if you just let your toddler look at the exhibits and come pet when it was time to pet, but otherwise...no kid is going to sit there for that at 2. It was still a fun adventure though.
Afterwards we went to McDonalds and I finally took the kids' pictures with Ronald.


Dallin always sits with him, pats him, hugs him, talks to him whenever we go and I never have my camera. So here it is. Dallin with his look alike double. Hmmm...which one is the bigger clown? LOL Even Kate got a turn. She seemed so surprised! Overall, it was a fun night and we are looking forward to going out again and trying something new!
KATE THE GREAT UPDATE: Kate is growing so very quickly. Here she is looking so big and cute with her lil hair clippie (that STAYED IN!) She claps (loves "If You're Happy and You Know It". She has 4 top teeth and 1 bottom one (yeah!) that she uses (OUCH!) She will babble and make little noises all the time just to hear herself. She "talks" so seriously to you. She can actually say "Mama" and says it all the time. She loves to tag along with Dallin and pester him. She is very happy and sweet and starting to stand more and more on her own. She is getting pretty confident and I think she will be walking within the month. She is also VERY emotional. If I so much as have an upset tone with her, she will pull a pouty frown and bawl (oh the perils of having a girl) Next week we will have back professional pictures and hopefully a checkup report.

Whaddya Lookin' At?!

So perhaps some of you may have noticed....possibly. That as of late I bear a striking resemblance to one of these 2


Now I don't have many recent pictures of myself but I am thinking that if I did...you may not be able to pick me out of the lineup. I have realized that I am a very negative (and sometimes downright mean) person. Instead of focusing my energy on doing the things and making the changes I would like, I spend a whole lot of energy being upset, disappointed, angry, and beating myself up over these things. After a very difficult week (especially Friday) at work and feeling like a failure at home (still or again..not sure) I just feel so emotionally worn out. Sometimes it just feels like success at work, at home, or in my personal life is just so far out of reach. I thought about quitting my job or just being lazy and angry at home (yes,...it IS indeed possible to be even lazier!) but I realized that ultimately, I am the only one who is going to be hurt by that. Work is not going to change. My home is not magically going to change. But I am going to change. I can choose to be more positive. I can choose to be a straight shooter while NOT being angry or mean. I can choose to work harder. I can be more consistent with the kids. I can organize the house (it may take an act of God, but it can be done). I can lose the weight. I can like myself. I am the only person I can control, so I suppose I should get to it. I am going to make some kind of plan for myself. Wish me luck! Hopefully, it's the last we'll see of those 2 characters.
P.S. I could really use some tips from my faithful readers out there. You all seem to have things so together. I am very envious (and unworthy..LOL).

McDonald's Smack Down

Ok so I went on a Mommy rampage today at McDonald's. I know that Dallin can be handful, high spirited, a turkey...even a brat at times...but he has not (to my knowledge) deliberately beat the crap out of another kid AND lest anyone forget...he's MY brat! Harm a hair on his head, and I'll take your head off! LOL Ok maybe not quite THAT bad, but I can definitely pull a Mama Grizzly Bear when my Cub is in danger.
So...back to McDonald's. Dallin was playing at McDonald's...typical playplace. We were out with my cousin, Jen, and her 3 kids. Luke, Jen's 3 year old son, came down off the playground and told his mom that there was a mean kid who was hitting him and spitting on him. Well, Jenn was on the phone with her hubby and kids will be kids (someone is always "hitting" "pushing" "yelling" and they are ALWAYS ALWAYS telling on each other even when it is nothing). So assuming it was typical kiddo behavior she told her son to stay away from the other kid and go play. While he was turning away, I noticed an ENTIRE HAND PRINT on the left side of his face. Bright red, every finger! When he came back around and Jenn was off the phone I told her what I had seen and that it probably wasn't an accident. I had Luke turn his face towards his mother (it had been away before) and you could STILL see it! She again told him to stay away from the other kid. Luke kept talking about it, but tried to stay away from the other kid. I was pretty mad. I told Jen that if that child hurt one of our kids again I was going to go off. Kids were crying all over the playground with choruses of "he hit me" and this kids mom just SAT THERE!
So fast forward....our kids remained safe for a while. Then Dallin and Luke came running to the table to get a drink and I noticed a big red welt on Dallin's forehead. Well, he's not the MOST coordinated so I asked him what happened. Luke piped right up and told me that the mean hit hit him "punched him right there in the forehead!" and was spitting! I was FURIOUS! I told Luke and Dallin to stay away from that kid and asked Luke to come and tell me the minute something happened. Well...didn't have to wait long. Dallin turned around and started to go up a tube (the right way) and I started hearing the scream that every parent knows. He was hurt. I ran over there, looked up the tube and saw that 3 year old sitting there with his shoes on above my child who was clutching his face screaming. That brat kicked Dallin right in the face! Oh and lest I forget...the mom was standing no more than 5 feet away waiting for her kids to come out of the playground. I was soooo mad! I could barely see straight.
I managed not to yell, but what came out was something like this:
V: What do you think you are doing!?
Kid: (stares)
V: You do NOT do that! That is NOT ok with me!
Kid: (stares with wide eyes)
V: Where is your mother?
V: (looking at mother who had moved to tube) Are you his mother?
Mom: Yes
V: He has been beating up every kid on this playground. He needs to GO!
Then I snatched up my sobbing baby and loved on him. She took her monster over to a bench and said something to him. Then they got ready and left.
Mom: Sorry
V: (almost said that's ok, but thought better of it) Thank you. (kind of angry tone)
So...Dallin has a black eye from McDonald's and I almost took out a 3 year old. Yep...a successful evening! Here are some pics of his war wounds.

Hard Core Parenting

This post is unplanned with no pictures or anything else exciting...just me ranting...so feel free to skip over.
I'm sure my mother told me growing up a million times(and I know she has told me since I have been an adult and a mother) but parenting is so hard. A million decisions, constantly questioning if you did the right thing or if you just screwed up your child for life. And for some unexplained reason, I was certain that if I just did everything "right" than parenting would be so wonderful and problems would be limited.
OK so reality sets in. God sent me Dallin. Today I am not sure if this is a blessing in my life or in his. What am I doing? How did I possibly think I could raise a child? And even if I was capable...THIS CHILD?! Come on! I have never felt so inadequate in my entire life. I am constantly able to rattle off about a billion mistakes I make in a day (and not just the stupid things like...what laundry detergent would make his clothes the brightest and whitest? but things I think maybe he'd be better off if he had a shot with a better mom) At this point I am not sure if his behavior or mine is the problem. If I wasn't so lazy...If I was cleaner...If I was better organized....If I was more consistent....If I interacted with him....If I didn't yell...If my discipline was more appropriate...if if if if...would he be a better kid?
Tonight, I went to gymnastics. This is his third week and he is always so excited to go. I knew he was tired today...we just got back from California and he started sharing his room...which means no sleeping and LOTS of partying..and bugging Kate by throwing toys into her crib and climbing in himself for a jump jump while she is asleep. But off we went to gymnastics. I got my neighbors to watch Kate and everything. After 10 minutes of gymnastics class, being treated like Dallin had the plague by the mom of the little girl he adores (it was like she couldn't stand Dallin being around her daughter), 2 wildly unsuccessful timeouts, and a head on collision with a little girl (the same one with the annoyed mom) after he wouldn't slow down and quit running around we went home. I am at the end of my rope here...I am trying to get Dallin around some other kids who are well behaved, but, of course, they don't want their kids around him for fear his behavior will rub off. I get that, but that is what we are HOPING for ....the good stuff rubbing off. I put Dallin straight to bed when we got home.
I was so humiliated and angry and upset. He is so wild and so defiant and he's 2...he can also be sweet and adorable. So I feel like I have created this monster and now I don't know what to do with it. I am feeling really overwhelmed by all of the changes to be made and I am not sure I am able to do it all. I'm not the patient mom or the consistent mom or the nice mom or the fun mom or the clean mom or anything.
Parenting is hard core....praying for a better tomorrow and some divine intervention.