What I Learned on Our Trip to the Museum

Today we went to the Bob Bullock Museum in downtown Austin.   It is a 3 story museum of Texas history.   It is not a "children's" museum although it receives continuous student tours.    I learned a lot of things today.....some of which are even about Texas history.

• We spent a few hours this week reading and doing some question/answer exercises on the things that we would see at the museum.  They actually provide a huge amount of curriculum resources, of which I only used a small portion, on their website.  It could have easily been a month or so of intensive history lessons/projects.   I learned my children will BEG to do more reading and history questions if they are being rewarded with earned television time.  
  

• One of the moms in our group kept hunching over her children, whispering angrily at them.  I could tell by her body language (and theirs) that she was anxious and frustrated by their behavior.  As a bystander, I hadn't noticed their behavior at all but I noticed hers.  The air all around her was tense and her patience was already gone.  The kids looked beaten down, annoyed, and angry.  I felt bad for them.  My kids were fine at that moment, but when I looked at her I realized what my kids have been seeing in me....all.....week....long and it was hard to watch.   I have been anxious, perhaps trying too hard, and have been short tempered and angry.   The air around me has been tense and heavy.  I learned that I don't want to be that mom.
  
    
• When we got to the museum we had a tour guide dressed like a cowboy.    As a child, I remember visiting museums and thinking that they were so so boring.  I hated being drug around to the different exhibits by the tour guide and listening to them drone on and on.   So you can imagine my surprise when my children were front and center, eyes on the tour guide and completely mesmerized by everything he said.  They raised their hands when he asked questions and their eyes would light up when he talked about things they "knew about" or they saw an exhibit that they were familiar with from their studies.   It was wondrous to watch, like magic.   I learned that when you know what you are looking at, it is seldom boring.    
  
      
• Jessica went to the museum to and it was a big lesson on "not touching".    She was a trooper for the tour but soon after she was done.   I met another mom there with a little girl only a few months older than Jessica.....but it was like talking with a precocious 7 year old.   She was so aware of everything that was going on, what it meant, facts and figures of the exhibit, appropriate museum behavior....everything.   Meanwhile I was trying to keep Jessica from picking up sticks off the exhibit, licking the mirrors, climbing the exhibit fences, and running through the back of the "oil well" exhibit.   I'm embarrassed to admit that I felt a little disappointed that my 3 year old wasn't as well educated/ groomed/mature as this other little girl.  I learned that loving my children where they are and helping them grow needs to be my priority instead of making sure that they are as good as x or y.  
  
• After the tour, both of my older children wanted to stay and keep looking at exhibits.   They wandered to various films (actually sat and watched them), and pointed out all the things they saw that they hadn't noticed before.   However, we had already been at the museum for over 2 hours and behavior soon began to deteriorate.  My kids started testing limits and their attention spans rivaled a gnat's.   In fact, I have noticed a disturbing propensity toward ADD attributes in both children.  Their desire to learn does not always meet their ability to focus.   I learned that I need to play to their strengths, keep it short, and go out on top.
  
• Oh....and also I learned about Texas History  :) 
  

Best Face Forward

Today my girls gave me a makeover.....again.   This happens almost every... single... day.   By the time they are done using their makeup AND mine plus various amount of hair accessories, spray and gel, I usually look like a dime store stripper.  In spite of this fact, I will probably let them do it again tomorrow.  This time was actually better than most and I didn't look quite so...ummmm....fancy?     I have had hot pink eyeshadow in my eyebrows and my hair in a billion little water spout ponytails.   My nails always look like I just graduated kindergarten.  In case you are wondering, yes I have left my house like this before because I forgot to wash it off and yes, I have answered the door like this before.    I have even sat in church and stared at my multi-colored chipped nail fluorescent nails.  I have gotten quite a few strange looks and sent people into fits of laughter.   When the girls have friends over, the favorite activity is "make over mom".  
There have been times when I look at those together moms--the ones with great makeup and nails and killer outfits who always look together when I see them--and I feel a little embarrassed, a little less than.  One such day, a fellow mom came to pick up her daughter from our house.  I was fully made over (of course) and she said "oh you're such a cool mom."   I smirked and said "Oh yeah...just look at me....in pjs, house a mess......"  Then she said "no, you are a really fun mom.   All those together moms take one look at you and THEY'RE jealous because you're the fun mom the kids want to be with"     That really struck me.  She was so together, so polished, so neat and crisp and she thought I was a cool, fun mom....and you know what?   She is so totally right!  I AM a fun mom.  I make a bajillion mistakes and I have a zillion things to do better, but when my girls do my makeup and we spend that time together it is like time stands still--their little hands on my face and their little faces so close to mine as they check every part of the makeover process intently.  Their giggles as they make mom's hair stand up.   Their gasps of awe and admiration at their finished product.  This won't last forever.  I will have years to look picture perfect, crisp, and professional, but how long can I really rock this chipped nail polish and hot pink eye shadow?   During our makeovers,  I am the greatest supermodel to ever grace their presence, but I am also their mom....who played with them.  

 

Playing Games-Time Well Spent

GAMES!!   I love playing board games.  I grew up playing them with both immediate family and extended family for all manner of gatherings and celebrations.   Every holiday and important event was sure to include a game night.   If you were old enough to understand the rules, you were in.  Not quite there, you could partner/shadow someone, and the littles just ran crazy.   It was heaven on Earth.   
It is a tradition I am proud to say we have carried into our own home.  We are blessed to have my entire family local so game nights with cousins running around and food flowing are frequent.   Also in my own home, we squeeze in a game or two any time we can.  We will play anything from Who Shook Hook and Hi-Ho-Cherry-O with our 3 year old to Settlers of Catan and Phase 10 with our older children.  Some my favorite times are when we are playing games.    We laugh.  We cry.   We get crazy competitive.  There is always something to be learned whether it is strategy, colors, numbers, or the deeper stuff---life lessons   No namby pamby, everyone wins stuff here.  Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose.   If you win, you earned that win because no one is taking it easy on you because you're a kid (or an old person).  If you lose, you lost (but wasn't it fun?)  Sometimes you just get lucky.  If you cry or lose your temper or cheat, people probably won't be willing to play with you next time.  Win or lose, your family will always love you.  I love watching my husband play games with our children.  I love watching my children play with each other.  I love playing with them.  The bottom line is that none of us is consciously thinking about all the lessons we are learning while we play, but I am grateful I can reflect on this time as time well spent. 

Jesus Wants Me for a Sunbeam......but What About What I Want?

Congratulations!  Today is your day.  You're off to great heights.  You're up and away! 

Jessica turned 3 years old on December 1st, and here we are the first Sunday of the New Year.   What does that mean?   

Ladies and gentlemen, that means we have ourselves a SUNBEAM!   In our church, the children move up a class each new year and, unlike the public schools, children are grouped together by age as of Jan 1.   So all of the kids who are 7 on Jan 1 are in the same Sunday school class, 8 on Jan 1 are in the 8 year old class, etc.    The very first actual class when they "graduate" nursery is when they are 3 years old on Jan 1 and that class is called the Sunbeams.  

Sunbeams is a rite of passage.   It is a big deal because they aren't babies anymore.  They are "big kids" and they go to the primary with the bigger kids and do all the things the bigger kids do.  While it is a very momentous thing, I don't think I would say it is a fun thing or even an enjoyable thing for most Sunbeams.   

Jessica was very unimpressed.   She was quite distressed that she was not going in with the toys and the food but instead was supposed to sit in a chair with a class and be a part of all the action.  She hung onto the door and cried as I was dragging her into the primary room.   She refused to participate in any of the activities and seemed basically oblivious to anything outside of her own little world.  She hates it when other people sing so a room full of other children singing was not a big hit.   She climbed all over the chairs, rolled on the floor, and spent a good amount of time turned backward in her her seat and making silly faces in a little mirror they gave her today.  She refused to answer any questions (and she still won't tell me what her name is.....though  I have heard her say it when pointing herself in a picture) and would not color anything they gave her.   She refused to go into her classroom after sharing time and I spent some time pacing the hall (and having a mommy freakout) with her until I bribed her inside with the promise of snacks. 

All in all, I would call today a screaming SUCCESS!  You did it baby girl.   I am proud of you (and me)   Let's face it being moved out of toys and snacks and into a "big kid" class is tough.   No kid (or adult...be honest)  really wants to give up free play and toys for any kind of actual class.  We haven't been terribly active with our church attendance so she really didn't know these folks well and has not mastered church class etiquette.  Add to that, church this year is 12-3 and if that isn't enough....she is one of the youngest in the class with her December birthday.   There is a BIG.....HUGE.....difference between a 3 year old and a 4 year old.   

So....Jesus wants Jessica for a Sunbeam......but that is definitely NOT what she wants.  That really got me thinking.   Today was super hard for me too.   I was not totally sure I wanted this for her.  "Should I just let her roam the halls?   Isn't she too young for this?  She isn't going to do this anyways.  This is too much for her.  Maybe she should stay with me.  Maybe we should go home."    Right as I was about to throw in the towel and list all the reasons why this is not going to work and is a bad idea, I stopped.   Wait.    Breathe.   She will be ok.  I will be ok.   I picture how Heavenly Father must feel when he tries to work with me.  Same stubborn streak.  Same resistance to change.   Same fierce spirit.  I imagine there are many times when I am turned backwards in my chair making faces in my little mirror or rolling on the ground or just refusing to do it and He patiently tries and tries again until I finally make the change-unwavering, full of compassion.   How great is His love.

It is hard letting her grow up and yes, the transition may be a little harder/longer for her than for the other children for various reasons, but she can do it and I need to let her do it.  I need to support her in this transition because this is what she needs right now.  I need to be part of the solution and the reason this is a success.   It is time for her to grow, and it is time for me to grow too.  

12:01 - Happy New Year

12:01 AM - 2015

Happy New Year!!    Goodbye 2014 - you were a real roller coaster ride.   Super high highs and super low lows.   It was real and it was fun, but maybe not real fun.   Valerie was promoted.  Christopher was promoted TWICE and is now a salaried member of management.  We went on a fabulous family vacation to DisneyWorld.  Kids were involved in swim, scouts, dance, soccer, and piano, and we made a life altering decision to homeschool our children.    We also lost our Grandma Faye unexpectedly and our dear friend, Phil, to tragedy. Our lives were touched by moments that tried to knock us down and take us out, but we are still standing and wow...what a trip!     Hello 2015 - here you are all shiny and new.    This time of year is one of reflection, hope, and promise.   There are many things I hope to accomplish this year (I will not list them here....you're welcome), but more than that....there are many things I hope to become this year.   This year I want to actively be the author of my own story.   At the end of this year, I want to look back and say  "man....that was a great story!"   and be proud that it is mine.  Problems that will arise this year will not BE the story, just plot twists to refine the characters and keep the story interesting.  My entire focus this year I have summed up in one word  -- LOVE.  When my dear friend, Phil, passed away so tragically only a few weeks ago it gave me cause to reflect on myself and those around me.   Sometimes things don't make sense and you have to hold on to something so hard just so things can keep going.   I am choosing to hold onto love.  I want to be the kind of person who breathes it in and breathes it out.  I want to curl up in it like a blanket and use it to shelter the ones who I hold dear.  I realized this year that every goal I have, every resolution I make, they all go back to this one word.   I pray that this year, regardless of how many resolutions I accomplish and how much progress I may or may not make on paper, that I may keep my focus and love more completely-to send it out in the universe and to receive it back unto myself.   
Happy New Years to my friends and family!  Love and peace to you all!      

All of the cousins 12:01 AM 2015