Now I don't have many recent pictures of myself but I am thinking that if I did...you may not be able to pick me out of the lineup. I have realized that I am a very negative (and sometimes downright mean) person. Instead of focusing my energy on doing the things and making the changes I would like, I spend a whole lot of energy being upset, disappointed, angry, and beating myself up over these things. After a very difficult week (especially Friday) at work and feeling like a failure at home (still or again..not sure) I just feel so emotionally worn out. Sometimes it just feels like success at work, at home, or in my personal life is just so far out of reach. I thought about quitting my job or just being lazy and angry at home (yes,...it IS indeed possible to be even lazier!) but I realized that ultimately, I am the only one who is going to be hurt by that. Work is not going to change. My home is not magically going to change. But I am going to change. I can choose to be more positive. I can choose to be a straight shooter while NOT being angry or mean. I can choose to work harder. I can be more consistent with the kids. I can organize the house (it may take an act of God, but it can be done). I can lose the weight. I can like myself. I am the only person I can control, so I suppose I should get to it. I am going to make some kind of plan for myself. Wish me luck! Hopefully, it's the last we'll see of those 2 characters.
P.S. I could really use some tips from my faithful readers out there. You all seem to have things so together. I am very envious (and unworthy..LOL).
1 comment:
Everyone you think has it together really doesn't. :) We're all struggling and battling the same feelings of failure! I PROMISE! But I'm very impressed with your plan to move forward and deal with weaknesses. I need to do that, too!
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